I'm back, Jack.

   So, I may have watched a bit too much Duck Dynasty on my hiatus.  Sorry for partying.  I'm back, Jack.  And it feels amazing.  My girls are both in school and I'm home alone today.  This marks my very first guilt-free day by myself since 2007.  I can't stop smiling.  Where the H-E-double-hockey-sticks have I been, you ask?  Well.  Here. And there.  Everywhere.  I just needed a break- a chance to stop and look around.




[source]

   I must admit following the firestorm about my Re|Engage posts (this one, specifically- it has been viewed over 60K times) I became overwhelmed.  All I wanted to do was write, blog, research, cry, celebrate, but my family had other plans.  My passion for writing began to takeover my household well before then.  But after all the positive feedback, my head was spinning.  I was trying to steal away to my laptop at any given chance, even taking chances that weren't given.  Though it infuriated me at the time, I now see my husband's point when he said, "For a woman who has chosen to be a stay-at-home-mom for the sake of this family, you sure are workin' a lot."  Damnit.  So, I let up on it for a month or so, offering only a giveaway.  But when summer hit, I realized I needed to give up writing for a bit, for the sake of my family.

   Last summer was my last chance with both girls at home before they both started school this fall.  I wanted to soak up every minute and memory before we began this new chapter.  It was probably one of the best decisions of my life.  We painted the town pink!  As grateful as I am for my followers and all your support, please forgive me for leaving you high and dry for so long.



jenhatmaker.com

   Just a few weeks into my self-induced break, my decision to focus on my family was further validated when my husband heard a big promotion test had just been scheduled.  He is a firefighter/EMT and the only way to move up the chain onto links with fewer headaches and bigger pay, you have to test well.  Back before the economy took a dive, firefighters were getting promoted by simply passing the test because there wasn't much competition.  Now, everyone is trying to fight the state of this country with better job security and, if possible, a raise!  The preparation for the promotion test entails memorizing about ten textbooks.  Depending on how well they retain knowledge from reading, some firefighters read the books five times through, while others must read them ten times through.  On the last promotion test, my husband studied for three months about five hours a day and beat the competition by scoring the highest.  He blew us all away!  Now with the pressure of having not one but two daddy's girls (accustomed to having fun daddy around to break the tension busy mommy creates) to clothe, feed, entertain, and inspire, and a reputation for scoring extremely well, he faces a mountain of stress every morning.  The test is October 9th.  I CAN'T WAIT.

  I considered myself lucky to have already come to terms with the fact that my writing was going to sit on the back burner for a while.  He studied the whole summer, averaging 5-7 solid hours of studying a day, and I scurried and hurried to every free kids spot in north Texas entertaining the girls and strengthening our bond before I have to share them both with their new worlds at school.  Of course, I ran out of cheap or free ideas in July, so I spent a fortune.  Yikes.  Now that Little Girl is in Kindergarten five days a week and Baby Girl is at preschool twice a week, I will finally allow myself the time to do what makes me happy (in addition to being a part of this little family) by clicking away until my alarm goes off and it's time to hit the carpool line.

unknown source

   These past few months not only offered me priceless time with my girls, and a few stolen moments with my busy man, but also gifted me with ample time to reflect.  I am making some changes in my path and a few on this blog...coming soon.  Thanks for sticking with me- if you're still stuck.  If you're not, I get it.  I'll be here if you need me.  :]